Rose Sweet is primarily an advocate for American annulments. She openly accepts "dating" while still married to someone else:https://rosesweet.com/living-as-brother-and-sister/
When I met my husband, Bob, we had to wait for his Catholic Church annulment to go through before we could even consider or plan a marriage. We went a year or so spending time as “brother and sister.” I was in Southern California and he was five hundred miles away in the San Francisco Bay area. We took turns driving back and forth to be together and both of us were very physically attracted to the other. We’d been high school sweethearts forty years prior and had met again at our reunion. Because we’d been young and innocent together and grew up in the sixties, it was easy for us to feel somewhat like real brother and sister. Still, I remembered his kisses and those first, sweet stirrings of sexual desire from decades ago. We could not wait to make love. Even though he was still married per God.
The Catechism of the Catholic Church says: No Dating
CCC 1646 By its very nature conjugal love requires the inviolable fidelity of the spouses. This is the consequence of the gift of themselves which they make to each other. Love seeks to be definitive; it cannot be an arrangement "until further notice." The "intimate union of marriage, as a mutual giving of two persons, and the good of the children, demand total fidelity from the spouses and require an unbreakable union between them."157
CCC 1649 Yet there are some situations in which living together becomes practically impossible for a variety of reasons. In such cases the Church permits the physical separation of the couple and their living apart. The spouses do not cease to be husband and wife before God and so are not free to contract a new union. In this difficult situation, the best solution would be, if possible, reconciliation. The Christian community is called to help these persons live out their situation in a Christian manner and in fidelity to their marriage bond which remains indissoluble.159 - can 1151-55. (We are called tell them to get separation legitimated, even if the annulment trial has begun)
She is mixed up and misleading regarding canon law. http://www.catholicsdivorce.com/Is-it-a-sin-to-divorce
Rose Sweet says: Current Canon Law (written when divorce was not so prevalent (1983 saw plenty of divorce) requires one to get the Bishop's permission before filing for civil divorce canon 1692 (in 100% of cases) if it is not an emergency situation (Cn 1153.1). Canon 1153 allows for temporary separation (not divorce) on own authority if in danger However, even bishops understand this is impractical if not impossible to implement in most places. No bishop has the authority to dispense with this canon and the vast majority of these divorces are not in accord with divine law. In my own diocese this year there are over 400 petitions for nullity; giving each party enough time and attention to hear their cause could be at least 6 hours (if not much more!), or 50+ hours per week just on hearing divorce pleas. And this is only a fraction of all divorced Catholics who don't bother with annulments. Clearly the Church needs and wants to help but she is not equipped to handle the deluge of divorce. We need a better system to handle the crisis, but that's for another post! (can't wait). The system is lawfully in place, and remains unused, while the innocent are thrown to the wolves of No-Fault and injustice rules. The local Church could certainly calm this crisis down in short order, but prefers to throw annulments at the problem. I understand that Rose has had 3 of them and may be motivated in part to ameliorate her own conscience.
If you've done everything you can, believe there is no possible solution left, and the marriage has been either unbearable, sinful, or dangerous to you or the children, then you may decide on your own authority (Canon 1153.1) to separate; after consulting with your pastor (he has zero authority regarding separation) or a wise and holy priest you have three right choices: Canons 1151-1155 must be read as a group (text and context) to provide an accurate picture.
( 1 ) Separate for peace, remaining civilly married and true to your vows—and to your spouse—until their death. This may seem impossible but it’s not. Many people have chosen this path and have full and happy lives. The suffering you endure in this choice can be lovingly offered up as a gift to God for the healing and salvation of both of you. This is the Catholic norm.
( 2 ) Separate for safety and file for civil divorce, but only after careful counsel (from whom?) and understanding you’re still married in the eyes of the Church. That means living faithfully to your marriage vows even if apart, until the death of your spouse. You must obtain permission from your bishop, or grave sin (canon 1692.) http://marysadvocates.org/research/catholic-divorce/
PS, Rose Sweet speaks in terms of "former spouse," an oxymoron like "former son or daughter." She shoves the Catholic into "Catholic divorce." I would like to communicate with her but in 2015 she asked me to stop contacting her.
Hugs,
John
PS, Rose Sweet speaks in terms of "former spouse," an oxymoron like "former son or daughter." She shoves the Catholic into "Catholic divorce." I would like to communicate with her but in 2015 she asked me to stop contacting her.
Hugs,
John
When I became a a Catholic in 1980,my marriage had been ended since 1974. Because we were both validly baptized, an annulment was required.
ReplyDeleteThe process took three years. I knew that my life, in terms of making vows, was on hold. It didn't kill me.
Over the years I have known of couples who dated when they weren't free to make a commitment. It almost always ends badly. Not worth the risk.
Do you remember what canon law your annulment was based on?
DeleteIt's good to expose the charlatans, John! How much money does this woman make misleading ignorant Catholics?
ReplyDelete$150 an hr? Something like that. Whenever possible, follow example of Blessed Elizabeth Canori Mora http://marysadvocates.org/a-saint-for-those-suffering-from-broken-unfaithful-and-abusive-marriages/
ReplyDeleteIt's free and its in accord with God's plan for marriage.
John,
ReplyDeleteTHANKYOU for writing this. I actually went to one of her speaking events 2 years ago and was SHOCKED at what she had to say!!!.. I cannot believe that she travels with priests in speaking engagements about the annulment process.. and they agree with the anti Catholic propaganda.
This is not a character assasination. She seems to be sincere and desires helping others .However- she IS dead wrong in what she says about annulments.
-I’m sorry this text isn’t more informarative or specific -I’m still schocked she goes around speaking about marriage and annulments and no one in the Catholic Church has reigned what she has to say in...
Rower, annulment is king therefor marriage has no rights. It's Church/anti-church you are witnessing.
DeleteDear Gast Family, is marriage based on law, or love?
ReplyDeleteHello?
ReplyDeleteThanks John- I was present for one of Rose Sweet’s program. I don’t know what to say . I would say it was sickening - but the Catholic Church; the only religion touched by Christ IS ALLOWING her to speak - basically saying : marry as much as you want : until you get it right . I’m sick of hearing how “annulments “ brings people back into the church. No it doesn’t . Not only that - but the children it leaves behind is usually not relatable. Divorce drags children through hell but they can survive: Re- marriage is he real crucifier of children and families . I hate 99% of annulments - thanks for being brave enough to have this site- hope more people read it
ReplyDeleteSorry - wrote the above without my glasses: corrections below…
DeleteThanks John- I was present for one of Rose Sweet’s programs. I don’t know what to say . I would say it was sickening - but the Catholic Church; the only religion touched by Christ IS ALLOWING her to speak - basically saying : “marry as much as you want : until you get it right”. I’m sick of hearing how “annulments “ bring people back into the church. No it doesn’t . Not only that - but the children it leaves behind are usually not coming back to the church.Divorce drags children through hell but they can survive: Re- marriage is the real crucifier of children and families . I hate 99% of annulments - thanks for being brave enough to have this site- hope more people read it